Being A Pallbearer At A Funeral Pallbearers How Many
Q. I’ve been asked to be a pallbearer at a funeral. What exactly is a pallbearer supposed to do? How many are there? And do I have to say yes? Frankly, I’ve only seen pallbearers in movies or on TV.
Pallbearers carry or accompany the casket at a funeral. They are friends, relatives, professional or business associates of the deceased—or sometimes members of the religious congregation. Pallbearers who do not actually carry the coffin are called “honorary pallbearers.” In the latter case, funeral home personnel do the heavy lifting or the casket is rolled out. For example, pallbearers wheeled the coffin at Michael Jackson’s funeral in 2009.
Consider it an honor to be asked to be a pallbearer. And, yes, you should accept unless you are ill or have other physical limitations, or geography does not permit attendance. There might be six or eight pallbearers, although numbers vary. Abraham Lincoln had 22 pallbearers when he died in 1866. A 1915 photograph from the Cattle Raisers Museum in Fort Worth, Texas shows nine cowboy pallbearers on horseback at a funeral in Montana. The ten coffin bearers at John F. Kennedy’s funeral represented the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines and Coast Guard. At another funeral, the deceased’s thirteen grandchildren were pallbearers.
Pallbearers may serve at Jewish (especially Jewish Orthodox) funerals, as well as at church funerals. Some funerals have both pallbearers and honorary pallbearers. You’ll never see pallbearers at a memorial service, however, because there is no casket. The term “pallbearer” derives from the Latin word “pallium,” a cloth used to cover the deceased back in ancient Rome. Over time, “pallium” was shortened to “pall,” a (usually velvet) cloth that covers a coffin, bier or tomb. At a military funeral, the flag covers the casket.
Do arrive at the funeral early to allow time to receive instructions from the funeral home staff on how to proceed. For example, you may or may not be asked to help carry the casket to the hearse after the funeral. Similarly, you may or may not be expected to escort the casket from the hearse to the graveside. Plan to wear a dark suit and tie. For women, who may be among the pallbearers today, a conservative dress or navy or black suit is appropriate. As a pallbearer, you will be seated up front. It is customary for the family to send you a personal note of thanks at some time after the funeral.
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From Plague To Coronavirus, French Brotherhood Keeps Burying The Dead Pallbearers Uk
BETHUNE, France (Reuters) - In a cemetery in northern France, members of the Charitable Brotherhood of Saint-Eloi de Bethune carried an urn towards a family tomb, each wearing a face mask that stood out against a uniform of black tails, white gloves and bicorne hat.
Members of the Charitable Brotherhood of Saint-Eloi de Bethune, which first formed during the plague 800 years ago, wear protective face masks as they leave the cemetery after a burial ceremony in Bethune, France, March 18, 2020. Funeral gatherings are restricted because of the coronavirus disease (COVID-19) outbreak. REUTERS/Pascal Rossignol
Behind them followed the deceased woman’s two sons, their partners, and a grand-daughter, their numbers restricted by a ban in France on large burial gatherings with the country under virtual lockdown as the coronavirus sweeps through Europe.
“We’re aware of the risks,” said brotherhood member Robert Guernot, “but our brotherhood was established during an outbreak of the plague.”
Guernot said he and fellow brotherhood members no longer embraced each other on arrival and endeavoured to respect social distancing restrictions while carrying out their duties.
“Sometimes we can lift a coffin with four. Other times they’re too heavy and we need more.”
Founded in 1188, the Charitables have for eight centuries taken care of funerals for the inhabitants of Bethune regardless of religion or wealth. Rarely, though, are they done behind almost-closed doors.
But in towns and villages across France, streets are largely empty after President Emmanuel Macron ordered a lockdown unprecedented in peacetime France. Citizens are permitted outdoors only to buy food, travel to work and seek medical care.
Asked this week if people could attend the funerals of friends, Prime Minister Edouard Philippe replied: “It’s dreadful, but we have to say no.”
Cemeteries in the northern region are now closed to the public except for burials, when numbers must be limited to a deceased person’s most immediate family, the local prefet, who represents the interior ministry, has said.
It may prove a bitter pill for grieving families in the weeks ahead.
“In these difficult times, and in a spirit of solidarity and out of love for one’s neighbour, we are still there to accompany the families of the deceased, and thus provide them with support and comfort,” Guernot said.
As the ceremony drew to a close, the brotherhood members stood in a ring outside the cemetery, and said sombrely with a single voice: “Requiescat in pace”.
The family turned and left, back to their confinement.
Reporting by Pascal Rossignol; Writing by Richard Lough; Editing by Mike Collett-White
Everything You Need To Know About Being A Pallbearer - ObitTree How Many Pallbearers Uk
If someone close to you has just passed away, the family of the deceased may ask you take part in the funeral and serve as a pallbearer. While many people are aware of proper and the role of the pallbearer, they may be hesitant about accepting the role.
A pallbearer is one of the oldest and most important ceremonial roles at a funeral. Pallbearers are responsible for carrying the casket from inside the funeral home and placing it within the hearse. Once at the gravesite, they again remove the casket from the hearse and carry it to the final resting place.
When you are at a funeral, you may just want to focus on comforting loved ones and . A funeral is a somber occasion; most people don’t want to be put in the position of having to carry their loved one or friend. However, being asked to be a pallbearer is an expression of respect. If you are asked to be one, consider it an honor. Being asked means the deceased’s family is placing their trust in you to transport the casket to its final resting place.
How To Select A Pallbearer
Selecting who you would like to serve as the pallbearers is never an easy task. Even more difficult can be asking those people to do the job. Regardless, the pallbearer is a job that must be done and most people will accept the role if they are asked.
Typically, there will be six to eight pallbearers needed. In earlier years, strong men were called upon because the distance between the church and the graveyard could be quite the distance. Today, thanks to modern technologies like cars and other mechanical devices, the role is more ceremonial than functional.
Even with modern technologies, caskets can still be quite heavy. You will want to make sure all of the pallbearers are capable of lifting and carrying the casket. They may have to carry the casket across uneven ground like stairs or slopes. Female pallbearers should ensure they are wearing comfortable shoes and clothing that allows ease of movement if this the case.
In most cases, pallbearers are people that are special to the family. This could include family members, close friends, or members of a group or club the deceased was involved with. Whoever you select, you will want to ensure that they will be able to manage their grief while executing the duties of the role.
You may want to consider naming an honorary pallbearer. This may be someone who might not be able to carry the casket but you still want involved with the service. An honorary pallbearer receives the special honor of being able to walk or ride beside the casket as it is being moved.
Tips For Being A Pallbearer
If you have accepted the role of pallbearer, you should consider it an honor and a responsibility. You may have questions or be unsure about the role. Rest assured, the following tips will help you make it through the day.
Ask the funeral director if you are unsure about anything.
The funeral director has done this more times than they can count. If you are unsure about anything, ask the funeral director for advice and help. They will instruct you how to carry the casket safely, where to sit/stand, at what point in the service you will be called upon for your duties, what your role at the cemetery is, and anything else you might be unsure about.
Dress conservatively
For most funerals, “church clothes” are the common attire. Pallbearers should dress up a little more though. A dark suit, tie, and shoes for men; a dark dress or suit for women. Make sure your hair looks good and you are not wearing too much jewelry.
Arrive early and stay late
Make sure you arrive fifteen minutes early. You don’t want to place added stress on the family wondering if you are going to show up before the service is about to begin. Plan to stay afterwards for a bit as well. You are representative of the funeral, staying to talk with guests will mean a lot to the family. This is when you can share stories about the deceased and express what they meant to you.
Sit in your assigned seat
There is usually a special section near the front reserved for the pallbearers to sit during the funeral. Unless you have an important reason to do otherwise, stay with the other pallbearers for the ceremony.
Consider it an honor
This cannot be expressed enough. Your job is one of the most important parts of the funeral. Treat it with dignity and respect.
Relax, everything will be ok
Don’t worry about making a mistake or dropping the casket. The funeral director and staff will make sure you’re prepared for the role.
Have you ever been a pallbearer at a funeral service? Tell us how it went and offer some advice for others in the comment section below.
This entry was posted in on June 2nd, 2017 by ObitTree .
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